Amsterdam Fine:
Romancing the Netherlands
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A View Worthy of Queen Beatrix

To be truly romantic, you really should splurge and stay in a 4- or even 5-star hotel in the heart of the city, a relatively good value now thanks to the strong US dollar. And since you never know when you'll be back in town, do yourself a favor and plunk down the extra $40-50 a night for a room with a view -- overlooking a canal filled with austere 17th century merchants' houses that lean at gravity-defying angles. Your room will probably be tiny -- everything seems tiny and narrow in Amsterdam -- so you might as well enjoy a nice view. You won't be in your room all that much anyway, there's too much going on outside.

TIP: A good website for hotels is www.hotelres.nl, or try this one for starters. Or you might skip the surfing and stay where we did: at the Hotel EstherËa (4-star, Singel 303-309, tel. 31-20-624-5146). Hotels fill up even during the off season (October-March) over the weekends with Europeans, so book your reservation early at the nicer places.

If you love art and architecture, leave your hotel early Saturday morning and head straight down the museum gauntlet: first slip into the Anne Frank House (Prinsengracht, 263); prepare for it to be very, very crowded but still extremely moving. The Van Gogh Museum (Paulus Potterstraat, 7) should be your next stop, where you can soak up the welcome colors of Vincent's sunflowers after the bleakness of Anne Frank and World War II. You'll probably feel light-headed from double-whammies of history and art, so have some quick sandwiches and Heinekens in the outdoor stalls next to the Rijksmuseum (Stadhouderskade, 42). The Rijks is the National Museum and has Vermeers, Frans Hals, and Rembrandts galore, especially Rembrant's masterpiece, Night Watch, which is lovingly explained in detail.

By this point you really should be a little delirious (three museums by early afternoon!), but press on like the professional tourists that you are. Europeans always marvel at Americans' masochistic sightseeing schedules. Walk past the famous art deco ABN-Amro Bank (Vijzelstraat, 66-80), and over the bridge on the right, where I stopped to snap a photo of a little yellow wooden sailboat shaped like a giant clog, bobbing in the water below. You never know what you may find floating in the canals of A'dam.

Make Friends... But Don't Get Too Friendly

For a special Saturday night dinner, head to a local bar like CafÈ Hoppe (Spui, 18-20), and joke around with the bartenders and the locals. We met a Dutch couple, a stewardess and pilot from KLM, Holland's national airline. The four of us split plates of spicy meatballs and salami dipped in mustard, and shared toothpicked squares of oude kaas (translation: old cheese -- eeew!) Not the best brand marketing, but it is good. Wash down this sodium smorgasbord with a draught lager, say an Amstel or Heineken, and chase it with icy shots of jenever, the national drink, a Dutch version of gin.

TIP: When you order a beer, ask for a pils (about a half-pint) or, for the extremely parched, a vaas (about a pint).

Okay, now say your good-byes, stumble out of the bar, and head for the Red Light District. The Red Light District is one of those places that defies explanation -- you should go and see it for yourself. It was interesting to see the mix of people visiting the area and going in to sample the wares. An evening stroll through the District is an interesting departure from the typical dinner-and-a-dozen-roses standard Valentine's Day fare.

While you're in the neighborhood, you should definitely stop for a drink at The Greenhouse Effect (Warmoesstraat, 53) and look to under the cash for an idea of what the specials are that evening. The atmosphere is like nowhere else on the planet.

It's Breakfast, Whether You Can Pronounce It or Not

When Sunday morning rolls around, roll out of bed, eat a quick breakfast and check out of the hotel. Leave your bags downstairs with the porter. If you're not totally museumed-out, cross over the Amstel River and check out what's left of the city's Jewish Quarter. There's a beautiful Portuguese Synagogue (Esnoga, Mr Visserplein, 3) that dates from 1675 and somehow survived World War II. Rembrandt's House (Rembrandthuis, Jodenbreestraadt, 4-6) is also in this neighborhood. You might also want to explore a little gem of a place, the Van Loon Museum (Keizersgracht 672), a quick trip back in time to a wealthy 18th century merchant's world.

Soak in the sunlight for a bit in Rembrandt Square and then go have a bite to eat. Sample some more traditional Dutch fare at a place like Beiaards Bierkaart (near Spui Square): try the pea soup with bacon so thick your spoons practically stay upright, chunks of rye bread, cheese, long, thin pints of Grolsch beer and cafÈ au laits for dessert.

After lunch you might want to browse through the Antheneum Boekhandel (bookstore, Spui 14-16), and then find the lovely and peaceful BÈnguinage (Begijnhof, look for carved sign, entrance on Spui). [Spui? -ed.] The 17th Century square and gardens that once housed BÈguine nuns is now home to mostly old ladies on pensions and female students.

Finish your weekend in busy Dam Square, in front of the Royal Palace, where you can watch the street cleaners sweep the cobblestones with wicked-witch twig brooms. We visited Nieuw Kirk (New Church, also off Dam) and stopped by the fancy Virgin Mall (Dam Square) for a souvenir wheel of oude kaas.

Finally, we had to dash to the hotel, grab our bags, and catch our flight back to the land of New Cheese, the harsher reality of New York City. We'll always treasure our weekend together in Amsterdam. And you know, maybe next time we will rent that houseboat.

Jennifer Bruni is glad to be back in the good ol' U.S. of A. She last wrote in this space about London.

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