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Dear Breakup Girl,

My problem is that I always try to keep in touch with ex-boyfriends. Boyfriends from high school, boyfriends from college, guys I date for a couple of months but it didn't work out...I'm not trying to rekindle old flames, but it's like I don't want to abandon the friendship (if there can even be one). I worry about losing contact (which is quite sporadic-- once, twice a year) with my highschool sweetheart... or my college fiance... sometimes the effort is mutual, sometimes I'm a little more persistent. I think it would probably be better for my sanity just to start writing people off... What do you think? What are the pros and cons of letting go/hanging on to platonic ties of old beaus? I don't want my address book to become a graveyard of people who USED to be in my life...(I should add that my track record with girlfriends is not longterm, which probably has a lot to do with it-- I've moved around a lot and don't have "childhood friends" or "best friends" that I see on a regular basis.)

--Velcro Girl

Dear Velcro Girl,

Well, it's one thing to enjoy blasting from the past every now and then, and yet another to "worry about losing contact" with your entire past -- especially when contact is indeed so sporadic. These are not active friendships, VG; these are souvenirs. Lovely ones, yes. And I'm not saying you should never ever check in (it is kind of cute and sweet). But yeah, it might be better for your sanity -- and, ahem, your current social life -- if you relegate those folks to Christmas-card level and get out and enjoy the rest of your summer, okay?

Love,
Breakup Girl

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