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Dear Breakup Girl,

My girlfriend is the most wonderful girl that I've ever met. I love her so much, and I really want to spend my whole life with her. We've been together for a little bit more than one year. But we've been having a problem. She is incredibly sweet and understanding, but there is one thing we just can't deal with. She is a Christian so sex is forbidden. She has had it with me a couple of times, and the rest is just messing around. But every time we do this kind of stuff, the next day she feels guilty and miserable. I just can't stand seeing her like this anymore for the fact that I am the reason that she is unhappy. I am so confused and I really don't know what 's going on with our relationship. I am madly in love with her, but I just can't stand it when she expresses how much she loves "God."

-- HD

Dear HD,

Okay, let's clear this up right now: you are NOT The Reason That She is Unhappy. The guy who's bringing her down is, well, the Big Guy. Either she sincerely believes that premarital sex is wrong, in which case she's got some guilt issues to work out, or she is sincerely scared of premarital sex (or other flavors of intimacy), and God is, well, the straw guy. So if you love her that much, do what she's comfortable with, and love that, even if it's holding hands with mittens on. Give yourself a break; give her some space -- and she just may work out a way to fit both guys into her life.

Love,
Breakup Girl

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