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Dear Breakup Girl,

I just got done reading the first two letters from your teen sex column. In her second letter, "Princess Emotional" expressed concern that her boyfriend does not show emotions and tell her how he feels. I am a 16-year-old boy and I believe my problem is just the opposite.

I enjoy telling my girlfriend what she means to me. I write her poems, tell her how much I miss her; I guess everything a girl would want to hear. However, she's told me that even though she appreciates all the poems and how I express myself to her, that sometimes she finds it annoying. Is there a point where you can show too much affection? Since we're teenagers, I believe she's more in it for the lust, though she too has written me a poem, and has told me what I mean to her. But unlike me, she doesn't do it often.

Is there such a thing as saying how much you feel too much; writing poems for her too much, to the point where she gets annoyed? Please help! I don't want to lose her over something silly like this.

--Confused in NY

Dear Confused in NY,

I totally get why that is your pseudonym. Yeah, what is it with girls? First we're all, "You don't express your love for me enough," and then we're like, "Okay can you stop now?" Leaving you stuck between a rock and a frilly place.

I guess, though, that for every girl who wants a poem-a-minute, there's one who doesn't. Or who would prefer maybe a poem a week, if that. Or maybe just on special occasions. Why? Because poems -- and such -- are special. Too many, and you run the risk of not letting them be that way.

Especially because you've also got to make sure that your relationship includes, like, conversation that doesn't rhyme. Friendship. Buddy-ness and hanging out and just chilling mixed in with the lusty-dovey stuff. You sure do need the romance, but the everyday stuff is what fills in the holes in the doilies. So while it's great that you're so expressive, I think you'll be just as impressive -- and fun to be with -- if you just let that stuff happen too. And "show, not tell," as they say. Don't worry! Soon she'll be all, "Hey, how come you stopped writing me poems?"

Love,
Breakup Girl

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