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Dear Breakup Girl,

There is this boy who constantly flirts with me, and I flirt back. So one day, I ask him out. And he says no.

After that he flirts with me worse.

I mean he flirts when we walk together; putting his arm around my waist or shoulders. He always tells me to come and sit on his lap or hugs me. He even once complimented me on my body (I don't think that was wrong, but I know some girls do). It made me feel god, and I'm not going to pretend it embarrassed me (because it didn't ).

Some people even think that we go out because he flirts so much.

Why won't he just go out with me?

-- Michelle

Dear Michelle,

Flirting, like having a crush, can be an end in itself. As in: it's just fun. (And if you don't mind if it involves comments about your end -- like the rear one -- that's your call.)

Thing is, the "end in itself" thing also means: sometimes when someone flirts with you it means they LIKElike you, and sometimes it means they like to flirt. Or sometimes it means they LIKElike you and want to go out with you, like girlfriend and boyfriend...buuuuut that part is rilly rilly scary, so they'll stick to the fun stuff.

That's all well and good until someone -- like, say, you -- wants more. Or least to know what the deal is. Which is why it wasn't a bad move for you to ask him out. But if he can flirt just for fun, you can -- I hope -- enjoy it just for fun. While you're listening (in your spare time between, say, classes and friends) for someone to actually step up and ask you out. Or, better yet, ask you what you think.

Love,
Breakup Girl

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