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Dear Breakup Girl,

I am reentering the dating world after a bad relationship a year ago. My question is: how do I handle money on the first date? I have been asked to go to dinner and a jazz club by a man that I really like. I am, however, rather independent and want him to know that. So, do I attempt to pay half of dinner and the club (which is often rather awkward) or do I simply make no attempt and let him pay? What do you think?

--Alice

Dear Alice,

Now that I know that your date is not at Hooters (violation of Breakup Girl's Rule of Dating #4), you can simply follow Rule #3: Whoever Invited Pays. At least at the early stages, that's what dates are for. If doing the Wallet Reach at the moment of reckoning makes you feel better, fine; but he, actually, should not accept. Don't worry about what message you send. Ideally, people say, "Here, let me" not because they think you need them to, but because they think it's nice.You show up for the date alone, that's "independent" enough. Now go have fun!

Love,
Breakup Girl

* who -- legal disclaimer -- does not offer actual legal advice, but rather suggests what legal interpretations might elucidate a situation

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