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Dear Breakup Girl,

Every guy I go tongue-dragging crazy over completely withdraws after a few weeks. No discussion, no "I can't see you that way anymore" calls -- zip. Meanwhile, other men have appointed themselves as my guardian angels due to their absolute unconditional love for me. The dumpers with whom I also have nonromantic associations (work, school, or theater for instance) show no outward signs of discomfort or weirdness when we are working together, yet invitations for a drink after work or a "shared cab" (wink-wink) from the theater completely disappear. What gives? I mean, I know I could just ask, but I figure (in my peevish and infantile state) that if he doesn't care enough to even tell me, then I'm not going to expose myself and appear to care. They tell me I'm beautiful, blah blah, blah, but it's hard to believe when there aren't any clues to this tediously repeating mystery?

--Dumped Before I Was Taken

Dear Dumped Before I Was Taken,

All I can fathom is that something about being gone "tongue-dragging crazy" over within a matter of weeks -- whether or not you think it's overt -- makes these guys, well, bite their tongues. With a side of not-unfaulty "well, I don't want to make things weird at work/school/theatre, so I won't say anything" logic. I dunno, if you do have some sort of working/schooling/playing relationship with these guys, maybe it wouldn't hurt to ask one particularly cool one what gave. Not for flagellation; just for future reference. Meanwhile, are you sure you should rule out all the easy-to-get angels? There might be an archhottie right under your, um, tongue.

Love,
Breakup Girl

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