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Dear Breakup Girl,
My boyfriend dumped me about two weeks ago because "it wasn't working
out." Then I found out that he cheated on me and then lied about it to my
face. So why do I still miss him when he's the one who treated me like crap?
Shouldn't I be glad that he's out of my life? Instead, I'm on the verge of
begging him to come back. WHY?????
-- Karen
Dear Karen,
STOP:
1 - even considering begging him to come
back
2 - thinking that you're a freak for even considering
begging him to come back.
It seems weird, but it's normal. Wanting him back --
at least in theory -- is not necessarily about stooping to his level; it may
also be about regaining the upper hand. It's like, things didn't turn out the
way you'd planned; you want to be the one to call, "Uh-uh, DO-OVER!"
You want the last word.
This is BG's empowering interpretation. of your
feelings. Use it instead of the one where you're thinking "Maybe he
wouldn't cheat and lie if I do something differently next
time."
Love,
Breakup Girl
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