All dressed up and no place to go on December 14, 1998…

Dear Breakup Girl,

My girlfriend and I have been dating ever since she asked me to our school’s Winter Formal last year. It went pretty well, although I had to work around her schedule because she was a seriously competitive swimmer. But, we were happy and had plenty of time for each other. I grew real attached to her during this time (in a mental sense, not physically). At any rate, about eight months ago she switched to another swim team, where they really work her out. For the past couple of months, she hasn’t had time for anything other than swimming and school. She’d always been tired, and would hardly talk on the phone or in person. I always had to sacrifice and work around her schedule to be able to do anything, since swimming is such a high priority to her. I’m a pretty busy guy too, but still, the lack of attention was kind of bothering me. Still, I thought it wasn’t so bad, until the Winter Formal came around this year. We went together again, and it was pretty bad. She barely talked at all during dinner, and her eyes were all bloodshot from not getting enough sleep. She swam about 8 miles that morning, so I can see why she was tired, but still, the dance was bad. She didn’t dance much at all, and every once in a while she would wander off and talk to people in some of her classes or to the people on her swim team that go to our school. All this tiredness and wandering — should I just accept this as the result of dating a nationally-ranked swimmer, or should I mention something to her about it, or what? I’m really confused, ’cause I’m no expert in relationships and stuff. Please help me!

— DC

BG busts out an important maxim after the jump!

Dancing around the subject on December 29 1997…

Dear Breakup Girl,

I was dating this guy for a few months and ended up moving to the city where he lived (no, he was not the reason I moved). When I moved in he asked me to a holiday formal. I knew it wasn’t a serious relationship and I knew we were both allowed to see other people, but he got involved with someone else and decided he wanted to be only with her. So instead of breaking it off before the formal, he took me. I didn’t know any of this and assumed we were going as a couple, but at the end of the night he broke it off. I wasn’t really mad about that — I was furious that he felt me the need to take me the formal where all of friends knew he was involved with someone else. Am I crazy to think this was wrong and childish?

— Angela

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