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December 15

No, it sucks to be a mean, poorly designed ad

Filed under: media — posted by Breakup Girl @ 2:15 pm

Behold:

The above, posted by Gwen at TheSocietyPages.org (and spotted/snapped by one Rachel K. in Toronto), should leave little doubt about how the ringless (and evidently friendless) masses are supposed to feel about themselves. But I’d venture to say it sucks to be the mastermind of an ad campaign that, in addition to being hell on the eyes, makes no sense. So if you buy a ring you’ll meet someone? That seems forward. It also seems capitalistically unwise to be harsh on the unmarried, who might, with another ad on another day, have been encouraged (though there are other reasons I don’t love this gambit) to purchase some sort of splurgy, sparkly single bling.

Anyway, back to Gwen: “…I’d say that what sucks isn’t being “alone,” it’s being told constantly that you must be sad and miserable since you aren’t coupled up.” Rah.

More on the ad, others like it, and “singlism” in general from Bella DePaulo here.

H/T @womensenews.

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September 2

Check yourself in/out

Filed under: media,News — posted by Breakup Girl @ 9:22 am

MTV + Foursquare + STD testing = a cool move in an effort to destigmatize taking care of your sexual health. Getting yourself tested should be as routine, and frankly, as Tweetable, as getting yourself a latte. I like!

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March 25

Spinster stigma alive and well

Filed under: books,issues,pop culture,Psychology — posted by Mia @ 3:49 pm

Single women are still feeling the “stigma” of spinsterhood, a new study of middle class, never married, women over the age of 30 has found. In fact, single women between the ages of 25 and 35 reported feeling both highly visible in certain social situations — like, God help us all, bouquet tosses at weddings — and highly invisible when it came to social status, in almost every situation from consideration by political representatives to expectations in office environments.

Despite the fact that 40% of all adults in The United States were single in 2009, it is women who often feel pressure to explain or justify their single status.

Pandagon goes into more detail about the humiliating catch-22 of the bouquet toss,and also explores the potentially harmful situations the pressure to be married can foster. That is: “men can make higher demands on women in exchange for their validation of women. Sometimes a woman’s devalued position in a relationship merely means she does most of the housework and emotional work, and her sexual satisfaction is a secondary concern. But in the worst case scenarios, culturally created female desperation can be used as leverage by domestic abusers to keep their victims in place.”

A new book by social scientist Bella DePaulo, PhD, Singled Out: How Singles Are Stereotyped, Stigmatized, and Ignored, and Still Live Happily Ever After
addresses all these issues and more. (The  fabulous bullet list she includes in her post about the book had me yelling, “sing it, sister!” at my computer screen.)

And here’s another antidote for all the single ladies, all the single ladies — and anybody who loves a great self-published comic: the amazingly funny and philosophic story, “My Every Single Thought” by Corinne Mucha. This comic chronicles the author’s attempt to get over an old relationship, and come to terms with a — yes — saucy new label: Single.

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July 17

Teen pregnancy: “Rational long-term economic choice”?

Filed under: News — posted by Breakup Girl @ 8:00 am

Via Broadsheet:

While some of us may stop short of actively mocking pregnant teenagers, current attitudes toward “the problem of teen pregnancy” are in fact stigmatizing and therefore counterproductive. So says sociologist Mike Males (now a researcher for YouthFacts.org, dedicated to reality-checking “the latest teen terror du jour”) in this week’s Los Angeles Times. “In truth, social- and health-policy discussions in this country would profit from abandoning the stigmatizing, prejudicial concept of ‘teenage pregnancy’ altogether,” he writes.

OK, I’ll bite. How come? (more…)

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