Get your heaving bosoms immediately to Smart Bitches, Trashy Books and today’s covers of/commentary on retro romance cover art.

When even the Real Doll™ rejects your attempts to reach first base, it’s time to think about rewriting your eHarmony profile, is all I’m sayin’.

Insanely great*:
Life Magazine, January 26, 1948
Quoth our tipster: More than 99% of these pages are UTTERLY FASCINATING. Wow. Post-war, pre-Mad Men enthusiasm, one foot in each half of the century. Amazing. At least buzz through the first 30 or so pages, including the “Atomic Road Show.” The Hollywood stuff is priceless.

Are you nuts about bolts?

* By “great,” we don’t mean “It would be great to roll back the clock on 62 years of feminism!” “Great,” as in, utterly glorious in its wacky retro exuberance.