Wanting more on October 12 1998…

Dear Breakup Girl,

Hi!!! I am 18 and during my life, I have been through a lot of guys. At first, I liked the one nighter deal thing and my friends couldn’t belive that I was letting all the guys treat me like a sex object. Anyway, I got labelled ‘slut’ because the popular guys were interested in me and the popular girls got jealous. The friends who stuck by me during this time, I later found out that they were using me to get closer to the guys they liked and called me a slut behind my back. (This was when I was 14 – 15.) When I turned 16, I fell in love, but he “played” me so I took a year to get over it and it killed me. Then after that, my relationships have been short (all my life they have been short i.e. 2 hours, 2 weeks, 3 months) hehe ooops.

I so want a LONG LOVING CARING RELATIONSHIP, I’m sick of getting used as a freakin sex toy, I want a man to actually like me for who I am, not for my appearance, but where the hell do you find one of those!! *L* I’m very affectionate, emotional and caring and I get hurt easy, it’s hard to find a man like that though. Like, I’m finding it real hard to trust men now. What should I do, do you think?

— Lisa

Dear Lisa,

I can’t tell you — or anyone — specifically “how” to trust people, but I can tell you this: don’t sleep with them until you do. If, boys and girls, a “long loving caring relationship” is what you’re looking for. YES, some long loving caring relationships definitely do start out as Take Me, NOW! Fine. But so far, Lisa, that hasn’t been your pattern. And I’m not saying you should play some sort of grody “good girl” withholding game. But if you want things to last differently, then have them begin differently. Then it’ll be way less easy for you to say, “Here we go [out for two hours] again.” And you and your beaux will both get the message: “Whoa, in order for this to work, we’ve got to be serious about actually getting to know and trust each other.” The boys will sort themselves out, and so will you.

Love,
Breakup Girl

Don’t you wish this sort of thing happened in real life?

A blatant, bling-laden, warmongering jerkwad receives quick and humiliating justice when a mysterious super-person of questionable ethics (hero? villain? you be the judge!) lays a seductive trap using ToolBoy’s own ego against him.

Oh, wait. I guess in this season of political celebrities and scandal, when the plots of comic books and Times articles can be easily quilted together like partisan MadLibs, “reality,” while very grim,  is also occasionally entertaining.

I’m talking, of course, about the case of Mr. Gabriel Schwartz. After a busy day telling LinkTV.org he supports a platform of “less taxes, more war,” which Team BG can’t defend even grammatically, the 29-year-old attorney and delegate to the Republican National Convention is now missing at least $50,000 worth of loot (possibly up to $120,000, say the cops).

You see,  just hours after Schwartz’s feisty interview, he met a young lady in a hotel bar, took her to his swanky room — and when he woke up, he just couldn’t figure out where he’d left his favorite $30,000 watch. Or the $20,000 ring. Or the $4000 earrings. Or the $1000 Prada belt.

Police!

(more…)

The New York Daily News, our fair city’s runner-up for best morning-after headlines, recently reported that women are not enjoying one-night stands as much as men. According to a survey published in the journal Human Nature, 58% of women said they would not have a casual encounter again, compared to only 23% of men who felt the same. The study found that women still tend to feel “used” after a one-night stand, and that in such brief encounters, often feel let down by sex that’s “not as satisfying as they’d hoped for.” Men, for their part, tended to regret their choice of partners, lamenting that the women “weren’t as attractive in the morning as they’d seemed the night before.”

Over here at BG.net, we’re not sure either how much we’d respect the ultimate conclusions of this study in the morning. Because maybe it’s not so much that “women have not adapted to casual sex” (Urr?) but that society’s double standards (still!) have not adapted to women having casual sex. Check out Feministing’s response for more.