Remember Sweaty Steve, he of the socially-crippling clammy-palmed hyperhidrosis? I’ve got a fantastic update for you, plus an equally fantastic shout-out we just received from a former super-perspirator. I offer both here with two caveats: (1) (spoiler!) finding a partner does not in itself equal success or happiness; in these cases, however, it was something these fellas both wanted and thought they could never have, and (2) as Wendy Shanker describes so eloquently in Are You My Guru?, while medical conditions may have psychological or psychosomatic components, that does not mean that all afflictions can be healed with some nice long walks and a change of attitude.

OK? First, from a fella named K., this spectacular portrait of HOPErhidrosis:

“I suffered the cranial version of this condition for about six years and let it turn me into an asexual recluse for most of my twenties, even leaving two jobs due to my supervisor’s apprehension over what impression it might give the people I interacted with (understandable, as I was a phlebotomist at the time and was told patients simply would not be comfortable having someone with sweat pouring down his face drawing their blood).  Just about every decision I made in those years was influenced by the sweating more than any other factor.  And I never found any correlation between the heavy sweating attacks and my activity level, temperature, liquid intake, etc. The only regular trigger was, the more social exposure, more sweat, but beyond that it would happen in any random setting, even walking alone on a cold night.

(more…)

MSN.com, Match.com, HappenMagazine.com: they’re in a healthy and satisfying 3-way relationship. This column, which previously ran at Happen, is being promoted at Match on Yahoo this week, so we are putting it back on our front page for comment.

This week Lynn hears from Sweaty Steve, whose hyperhidrosis (unusual sweat output) has put a crimp in his dating life:

The last time I went on a date with someone, we never made eye contact with each other and hardly talked because I was busy trying to hide my hands and checking my pits every time I went to the bathroom.

Does Steve need to deal with his nervousness, his condition, or both? See what Lynn has to say, then leave your own comments or encouragement below!

Tongue-tied on February 23, 1998…

Dear Breakup Girl,

I am seeing this guy and I like him so much that I have a hard time talking to him. I get my words mixed up and if I say anything I feel so stupid. I can talk to him on the phone but something happens to me when I try to talk to him in person and I feel like its making him lose interest. HELP ME!!!!

— Sally

Dear Sally,

Ooooh, is it David Duchovny? Because when Breakup Girl talks to David Duchovny — well, that one time when she talked to him (BG is not making this up) — the same thing happened! I like him so much that I said something really stupid! Which I really think is why he lost interest!

But in your case, no matter who the guy is, here’s what I’m worried about: excited-love-jitters are great — they’re fun, and they should never wear off completely. But they really shouldn’t get in the way every time. And problem is, now, you’re nervous about being nervous. So Sally, consider this: anyone you’re “seeing” should be someone you’re comfortable with. Someone with whom you feel smart, not stupid. Someone whom you feel you’ve got something to say to, and who likes what you have to say. If this particular match doesn’t fit that description, speak up and find one that does.

Love,
Breakup Girl