Telling it like it should be on January 26, 1998…

Dear Breakup Girl,

I am a married woman in love with a married man. Do you think married people have the right to be in love with someone else? I never want to cheat on my husband, but I am very in love with the other man. Please help.

–Nano

 
Dear Nano,

Do married people have the right to be in love with someone else? Yeah. And the KKK has the right to march, and Hanson has the right to sing. These “rights” are principles; they don’t mean that nobody gets hurt. You’re doing your best to be noble, but clearly something is amiss. The question you really should be asking is: “Where did I write the number of that marriage counselor?”

Love,
Breakup Girl