Dear Breakup Girl,

My divorce was final a year ago. I had the opportunity to take my ex to the cleaners, so to speak, in court (nude pics of him and his lover in a hotel room and information regarding his affiliation with a prostitute). However, I chose not to give all my money fighting in the courts and settled out of court. I sometimes regret my decision — only because I want him to know what I know about his affair and his affiliation with a known prostitute. He prides himself on being a “highly moral and ethical person” (he is psychologist). I still have all the documentation I had planned on using in court…and have contemplated on sending it to his new bride (he mail ordered her from Russia via the Internet). Or just giving the info to him…to let him know he may have thought he got on over on me….but there are others that now know of his less reputable side. Should I simply leave well enough alone…my head says I should….my heart says I still want to hurt him as he did me. What do you think?

— Beeja

Dear Beeja,

Don’t leave well enough alone. Leave hellish enough alone.

Love,
Breakup Girl

This advice was originally published September 14, 1998.