Unfamiliar territory on August 10, 1998…

Dear Breakup Girl,

Here’s the scenario: I recently started dating this guy and he is extremely nice, and funny, and good to me…when he’s with me. Sometimes two or three days pass without a single phone call, and yet he “bounces” back and is right back to being Mr. Wonderful after these disappearances occur. I know the theory is to leave a man be during this “time to himself” but is this normal in a new relationship? I hope I’m not in denial, ignoring obvious signs telling me to walk away. I have a pretty good head on my shoulders, and I really do have a good feeling about this guy. It’s just that I am used to two different types of relationships. One is where the guy is completely not interested and disappears, and the other is where the guy is sooo on your sh*t that he calls every single day. Both have been disasters. Therefore, I keep telling myself that this is a HEALTHY relationship and that I’m just not used to it. Talk to me girrrrl!

— Jennifer

Dear Jenniferrrrrr,

Let me second that emotion: this is a HEALTHY relationship and you’re just not used to it. Two or three days without a phone call is not a “disappearance.” It’s not even “time to himself.” It’s not anything to “bounce back” from. It’s not the Mr. Hyde flipside of “Mr. Wonderful.” It’s “recently started dating.” Step away from the phone and enjoy it!

Love,
Breakup Girl