Getting your stuff back on January 12, 1998…

Dear Breakup Girl,

I dated my ex for about a year. We broke up last year, but I have yet to get all my things out of his apartment. He told me he has still kept my toothbrush. I don’t want him back, I just would like my stuff back! How would there be a good way to go about this?

— Jaime

Dear Jaime,

Surely you’ve replaced the toothbrush by now. But Breakup Girl still wonders what on earth he’s doing with your toothbrush. Has he bronzed it? Or, conversely, does he just keep it around for use as the “guest toothbrush?” Neither one is good news.

In any case, here’s what you need to do…

1. Note that it’s been a year.

2. Confront whatever it is that’s keeping you from picking up the phone and telling him nicely that you’re coming over to get your stuff (minus the toothbrush). What is it: fear that you’ll start liking him again? Resistance to saying the final, material goodbye? Good old-fashioned laziness? You tell me.

3. Pick up the phone and tell him nicely that you’re coming over to get your stuff (minus the toothbrush).

Love,
Breakup Girl