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Dear Breakup Girl,

You are the most level-headed and genuinely thoughtful advice heroine in all cyberspace. And so, I submit my problem to Your Superness...

I am an attractive person; I want to make it clear that my comfort level with my admittedly-rather-average-but-unique-and-therefore-desirable appearance is satisfyingly high. I also sighed right along Will Shakespeare when he wrote "My mistress eyes are nothing like the sun...", because sometimes a lover's so-called imperfections are her most perfect attractions.

My problem is a small one: one small mole, present since birth, on the left cheek. Now, I will normally be the first to champion the fact that beauty is in the details, that it's the tiny unique things about each person that makes him/her desirable. And it's not as if this is a particularly ugly feature--it's basically just a big 3-D freckle. No ugly discolorations, no honking huge black hairs growing out of it.

Still, there's a certain double standard at work in the world--on Cindy Crawford, it's a "beauty mark"; on me, it's just a mole. I know there might be that one in a million girl out there who finds it the sexiest thing she's ever seen, but how many more are there who might be turned off or away by this? Should I really look for a needle in the haystack when I could just roll in the hay?

I could relatively simply, safely, and inexpensively have it removed and greet the world with a new, unblemished face. Believe me, I have plenty of other unique traits to take up the slack. But I'm not sure what I should do...what do you think?

--Nothing Like The Sun

Dear Sun,

Save the mole! It just doesn't sound like a big enough distraction -- to you or to others -- to warrant removal. If what you say is true -- your high comfort level with your appearance, your argument for the attraction of "imperfections," the apparent lack of "wires" ("if hairs be wires...") -- then, frankly, I'm not even sure why you're asking me about it. The only woman I can imagine who might be turned off by this is -- on a purely "one is enough" basis -- is, well, Cindy Crawford.

Love,
Breakup Girl

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