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Predicament of the Week
In which Breakup Girl addresses the situation that has, this
week, brought her the most (a) amusement, (b) relief that it is happening to
someone else, and/or (c) proof that she could not possibly be making this stuff
up.
Dear Breakup Girl,
I had been engaged to this girl for eight months and I had been going with
her for a couple of years. I phoned her one night to see what she was doing and
was told that she was gone for a walk. So I waited a few hours and phoned
again. The second time I spoke with her little sister and was told she was out
walking with the guy from up the road. They had been out walking for three
hours and it had gotten dark an hour before. So I went to find my wayward wife
to be. When I arrived at her place she was there waiting for me. She told me
this story.
She said she had gone for a walk with the guy up the road around seven
o'clock. They had been walking up a rarely travelled dirt road that leads down
to a lake where people go to make out. While they were walking along a truck
came down the road and stopped at a potato field. This was around seven-thirty
in the evening. She said that the people in the truck had came to steal
potatoes out of a farmer's field. She said that she had been scared of the
potato thieves so she and the guy she was with hid in the woods. They hid for
approximately three hours alone in the woods. Then they finally snuck away to
the safety of home around eleven o'clock.
This is her story explaining to me, her fiance, where she had been and what
she had been doing. All the time that she was telling me this story I was
thinking she was the worst liar that I had ever heard. Before I left she told
me this three times. She was overly cheery. Do you believe her story? What do
you think her and this guy were doing in the woods for three hours in the dark?
Also I work for a potato farm and potato thieves do not steal potatoes out of a
field for three hours at night. Were they going to harvest the whole field or
something? Anyway, watch out for the potato thieves.
--Wondering
Dear Wondering,
Hmm. I was going to say that yeah, it sounds
perfectly plausible to me. Until you brought in your expert observation
that these thieves did not seem to follow what is apparently considered
standard potato thief m.o. That is where her story really falls apart
(well, that plus her suspiciously "cheery" demeanor). If I were you,
yeah, I'd be a little suspicious.
Love,
Breakup Girl
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